[Ok this is going to be a long entry, and as I write it, I don’t know if it will ever make my blog, or even if I will ever hit the save button. Not only will it be long in text, but also long as in preparation, and difficulty. After all, the subject is very controversial, and can sparkle bad triggers for everyone. I urge you, reader of this to either stop after this paragraph, or read the whole thing. Don’t judge without reading all of it.]
This entry is also in relation to the virtual world of Second Life. The part of Second Life I exist is only open for adults, in this case meaning people who are in real life over 18 years of age. There is also a part for younger people, a by Linden Labs closely guarded environment called the “teen grid” These two environments are not linked.. meaning teens cannot come into the adult part, and adults can neither sneak into the teen part.
However the ‘adult grid’ on Second life has many avatars that are made to be younger then 18 years old. These are adults who want to play younger humans. I have no figures, but I think that there are between 1000 and 3000 active accounts on the grid where the main avatar is a child or teen form. On the total number of accounts just over 3 million, with about 1 million active accounts (used less then 60 days ago) it is a small proportion of the population, but as for a group, it is quite a large group.
In the subculture of Second Life, the term ageplay has a slightly different meaning then elsewhere on the net. More specifically, in Second Life, the term “ageplay” in general is linked to ‘children’ and ‘teens’ who are or like to be sexual, where as elsewhere on the net, it can refer to both adults who are sexual or non sexual in their needs to be a ‘child’ online.
It is possible that a ‘child’ or ‘teen’ belongs to one or all 4 of the given groups, although most will only belong to 1 or 2 of these groups Also note that anytime I say ‘Child’ or ‘Teen’ I refer to it as in the context of a role play. For real children and teens, I will use the terms bio-child (biological children) and bio-teen (biological teens)
Now the reasons for being a teen, or a child on Second Life can be very diverse. There are people who have the emotional need to act out as a bio-child, or bio-teen. Some have been abused in different ways (sexual, physical or emotional) as a bio-child, while others might have other problems the deprived them from having a normal loving fun childhood (For people who had a lot of illnesses or a long sickbed in their youth).
Most of this people feel they have a Child inside them, a child that wants to come out , and play. I call this group people with (a) strong inner child(ren). Yes, one can have more inner children, depending on one’s needs. By the way, there are also people with a completely normal childhood, who feel this need… it happens, though they are a minority, sadly.
Then there is a group I call fakers. These are people who like to play a child or teen for profit. How? Well there are several methods. On of the most used scams is a ‘child’ finding parents, and try to get as much allowance and stuff from them as possible. Then one day.. leave to not return. An other method, is using a child avatar, often said to be abandoned by his or her parents, to beg to passing others for money or goods. They hope the image of a child will make you pity them, and give them what they want more easily.
If you see such a Fake child, think of this: The person behind that avatar it is rich enough to have access to a reasonably fast computer. If he/she wants, they can buy lindens with Paypal, or a credit card. Or even do one of Second Life’s many jobs. Though there are not too many fakers (I know only a few cases), the number of Fakers seem to increase lately.
Sadly, this term is often used in combination with paedophiles. Though the reason is obvious, both seam to deal with people under the age of 18 and sexuality. I think the big difference, is that for age players, it is only a role.. They knowledge the role they and/or their partner play is played by an adult, and would not have it any other way.
For some, sexual ageplay takes place between ‘children’ or ‘teens’ of roughly the same age, for others, this is extended to a sexual roleplay across generations (mom / son, daddy/daughter, Aunt/niece or whatever).
As for the ‘same age’-age play, I see most of them either act in semi innocent games like playing doctor as a child, or wanting to relive the first time sex as a teen. Also, I see many ‘children’ and ‘teens’ who engage in more specific sexual activities actually behaving like adults, in words and speech. And all but a very few will indeed think of each other as children at those moments, but as lovers, no age given.
Especially the second, cross generation roleplay often gets portrayed as being paedophilic. Though I can understand why people get that idea, it is not per definition right. For me, such a roleplay is more a roleplay in terms of BDSM, not much different from puppy play. In both cases, the type of role (submissive or dominant) is made naturally, the puppy (or any other pet is submissive to his master, and the ‘child’ being submissive to his/her ‘caregiver’ . Because of the easy integration of things like restraints, diapers (a big fetish of me), breastfeeding, spanking and such, I prefer cross generation ageplay as submissive. I even can admit I love being an the start, and being forced back into diapers. Still that is called ageplay, or infantilism, but it has hardly to do with real children, just with objects and activities related to them. This said, none of the moms I ever had in Second life ever have been engaged into sexual ageplay. I keep this more as a roleplay on either Instant messaging or Real life. I for one, think cross generation ageplay like this is completely harmless.
A very difficult subject. More difficult as many people think it is at first glance. Of course for most people the first reaction is: Pedo’s? Kill them, castrate them. Out of their own desire to protect their young loved ones.
I for one, think being a paedophile is not a choice, but forced upon you by genes, up bring and environment. Killing someone for being a paedophile would, in my eyes be like killing someone for having brown eyes a white skin, being gay, having a sixth toe, or any possible gene defect.
I truly believe that someone doe not choose to be a paedophile, yet I do believe that someone can choose on how to act on it. For me that means, that a paedophile is able to choose to keep distance from bio children, choose not to act on his lust.. not to accept jobs involving children. Even though it might be a disgusting thought for some of you, the idea the people look pictures of bio children to get off (and I don’t mean sexual explicit ones but, say, pictures of children in swimsuits) does not really bother me. If they in that way can keep themselves from actual sexual activities with bio children, and keep bio children from being exploited, I think it is a workable solution. The same goes for roleplaying in second life. If by roleplaying with a ‘child’ or ‘teen’ they can satisfy themselves without the need of bio children or bio teens, again I find it a workable solution. However, I don’t think that a paedophile can never demand to be served by a roleplaying teen or child. It is always up to the child weather or not that request is honoured. And, as always, I think that trying to force or push after a no, is not done. Trying to go further after a clear no, for me is very short of actual rape. Consent is always needed.
My visions in short:
There are people in Second Life who want to play a child avatar just for the sake of reliving their childhood or teen years. Those people, by anyone’s standard in Second Life should have the right to do so, without being questioned, or judged.
There are also people who are Age Players who like to have erotic or sexual contents within their being a ‘child’ or ‘teen’ Some to relief first time experiences, others as a part of a complicated, but honest BDSM setting. Though I can understand this can puzzle others, I think it is a legitimate roleplay. I, myself belong to this group, and I will always advocate for this kind of play, especially since I have seen this kind of play helping to heal people, including myself.
Then There are fakers. People who are kids for financial gain. When I will ever find someone like that, I will blow the whistle. I have no acceptance for people being jerks.
Last there are true paedophiles, that like in any group, are part of the child and teen population too. I will never advocate pro paedophiles, yet, in a certain light, I think it is better t have them lurking on Second Life then in real life.
Studies to alternative ways for paedophiles to get their satisfaction are as of yet, still inconclusive. Some studies indicate that would really work, but a few also clearly contradict this statement. I for one believe these alternate ways work.
This piece was hard to write. It took me several days, as I wanted to be sure to get the idea across that I am liberal, without people getting the idea I am advocating for paedophiles. If someone still believes that, I have failed.